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Thread: The Men’s Room

  1. #151
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    In The South Stand warringtonsaint's Avatar
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    Excellent video from a group of Warrington lads

    https://www.warringtonguardian.co.uk...mental-health/
    "The great fallacy is that the game is first and last about winning. It is nothing of the kind. The game is about glory, it is about doing things in style and with a flourish, about going out and beating the other lot, not waiting for them to die of boredom." Danny Blanchflower.
    Might have been written by a footballer about football - but never a truer word............

  3. #153
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    Imploded on Wednesday. It's been coming for a while. They say no fool like an old fool. Just an insight for us all to learn. I was signed off sick with workplace stress. I hold a professional role in transport. I agreed to "keep in touch" gradually that became more intrusive until I cracked. I now need to build up again which started today with a mega walk with a mate. I have now turned the phone off. Learning from each other helps even old fools.

  4. #154
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cyprus View Post
    Imploded on Wednesday. It's been coming for a while. They say no fool like an old fool. Just an insight for us all to learn. I was signed off sick with workplace stress. I hold a professional role in transport. I agreed to "keep in touch" gradually that became more intrusive until I cracked. I now need to build up again which started today with a mega walk with a mate. I have now turned the phone off. Learning from each other helps even old fools.
    You're not on your own mate, I've had a couple over the past few weeks, including this afternoon for a variety of reasons but one thing I can control is that I haven't been doing much exercise and have been supping more.

  5. #155
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    Quote Originally Posted by Angry Dave View Post
    I've been thinking about posting in this thread for a while now and today seems like a good day for it as I made a big decision last night, one I'm hoping turns my life for the better. It came after yet another stressful day at work and a couple of pints in an Irish bar where I know the owner who has just become a father. To cut a long story short he basically said to me, why was I sacrificing my life and health in the pursuit of money. For those that don't know, I work (well until this morning) in Oil & Gas which may sound good but the reality is that's it's a ruthless business, long hours and a lot of time spent away from home. The industry went into freefall around 2014 when a lot of cost cutting exercises were made due to the oil crash. The knock on effect has been that companies realised that there were ways to maximise profit and this has carried now the price has recovered. What it means in reality is that it's now an even worse business to work in, it was never that great but the money and time off made up for it in the past.
    This past 18 months has been difficult and has affected both my physical and mental health, I just couldn't see the wood for the trees, also not helped by the amount of booze I was putting away at times. I already feel like a weight has been lifted and I intend to follow that up by finding more of a balance.

    I'm not saying I'm 100% certain I've made the right decision but I hope it helps anyone who's feeling similar. Look after yourself, you only get one go at life so make it worthwhile.

    If anyone want to chat the feel free to PM me.
    So just over 9 months on from this and yesterday I made a couple of big decisions. I'm in Germany at the moment, well actually sat on a train going to the airport to come home. This Covid outbreak has caused our site to be closed and I'm not hanging around to end up locked down here. The reason I mention it is I've decided now that I'm done with working away, I started to drift back to it last year instead sticking to my guns but the truth is, I hate it now.
    The second thing I decided was that I'm going teetotal, as much as I've tried, and god knows I have, me and booze don't go together, so that's it, I'm calling it a day. Other than that, I hope everyone is OK.
    Last edited by Angry Dave; 24th June 2020 at 08:45. Reason: Uber tired

  6. #156
    In The West Stand Ralph Fridge's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Angry Dave View Post
    So just over 9 months on from this and yesterday I made a couple of big decisions. I'm in Germany at the moment, well actually sat on a train going to the airport to come home. This Covid outbreak has caused our site to be closed and I'm not hanging around to end up locked down here. The reason I mention it is I've decided now that I'm done with working away, I started to drift back to it last year instead sticking to my guns but the truth is, I hate it now.
    The second thing I decided was that I'm going teetotal, as much as I've tried, and god knows I have, me and booze don't go together, so that's it, I'm calling it a day. Other than that, I hope everyone is OK.
    Good for you mate. You can do it

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    Best of luck, you can do it


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

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    Two biggies there Dave, go for it, but don't be hard on yourself if one slips a bit.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Cyprus View Post
    Two biggies there Dave, go for it, but don't be hard on yourself if one slips a bit.
    About half an hour after I posted that someone called me about a job in Sweden

    Bloody good one too and it's something a bit different so I'm having a think about it.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Angry Dave View Post
    About half an hour after I posted that someone called me about a job in Sweden

    Bloody good one too and it's something a bit different so I'm having a think about it.
    What is the percentage increase in your wage Dave when you take a job overseas compared with the UK?

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    Quote Originally Posted by tilly2006 View Post
    What is the percentage increase in your wage Dave when you take a job overseas compared with the UK?
    It can honestly vary quite considerably. Germany wasn't great but there wasn't much work about so it's a case of making do, and that's what I hate, being taken advantage of. I was thinking about Sweden last night and it's a very good package and as an employee, not a contractor which is a big thing but also giving me a way out of the oil industry so I'm going to at least take the interview if offered.

    As for the drink side of things, I know it isn't going to be easy to change something that's been a big part of my life for over 20 years but that and work have been playing on my mind for a while, I know I've needed to make changes and now seems like as good a time as any.

  12. #162
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    Good luck with it, Dave.

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    All the best to all who are facing tough times, decisions, mental health challenges... takes a lot of courage to talk about these things - but often it's worthwhile1

    ...as a way of releasing stuff, letting go, being heard and knowing that there are others out there too facing tough times - and we're not always as alone and isolated as we might think... plenty of people who care too amongst it all.

    Cheers, Chris

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    Quote Originally Posted by St. Christopher View Post
    All the best to all who are facing tough times, decisions, mental health challenges... takes a lot of courage to talk about these things - but often it's worthwhile1

    ...as a way of releasing stuff, letting go, being heard and knowing that there are others out there too facing tough times - and we're not always as alone and isolated as we might think... plenty of people who care too amongst it all.

    Cheers, Chris

    Cheers, and you're correct about speaking up, I still don't like it but I find it helps me.

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    Best of luck Dave
    Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional

  16. #166
    Learning All The Songs roy litherland's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by St. Christopher View Post
    All the best to all who are facing tough times, decisions, mental health challenges... takes a lot of courage to talk about these things - but often it's worthwhile1

    ...as a way of releasing stuff, letting go, being heard and knowing that there are others out there too facing tough times - and we're not always as alone and isolated as we might think... plenty of people who care too amongst it all.

    Cheers, Chris
    Spot on Chris , McMillan nurses did it for me , always thought with others I was 'mentally' tough as teak BUT , the double whammy - the big c and then the Corona turned me into a nightmare which I hadn't realised , I asked I received and did everything asked , great people when needed and where they needed.
    roy litherland it's happened i told you it would

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    Quote Originally Posted by roy litherland View Post
    Spot on Chris , McMillan nurses did it for me , always thought with others I was 'mentally' tough as teak BUT , the double whammy - the big c and then the Corona turned me into a nightmare which I hadn't realised , I asked I received and did everything asked , great people when needed and where they needed.
    Puts my crap into perspective but also goes to show that you can think you're mentally tough and you're struggling. Anyway, hope you're as well as can be Roy, I always like reading your posts.
    Last edited by Angry Dave; 27th June 2020 at 09:07. Reason: Video ref

  18. #168
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    Quote Originally Posted by Angry Dave View Post
    It can honestly vary quite considerably. Germany wasn't great but there wasn't much work about so it's a case of making do, and that's what I hate, being taken advantage of. I was thinking about Sweden last night and it's a very good package and as an employee, not a contractor which is a big thing but also giving me a way out of the oil industry so I'm going to at least take the interview if offered.

    As for the drink side of things, I know it isn't going to be easy to change something that's been a big part of my life for over 20 years but that and work have been playing on my mind for a while, I know I've needed to make changes and now seems like as good a time as any.
    Wishing you the best of luck. Take care

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    Learning All The Songs roy litherland's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Angry Dave View Post
    Puts my crap into perspective but also goes to show that you can think you're mentally tough and you're struggling. Anyway, hope you're as well as can be Roy, I always like reading your posts.
    Keep going mate you will come through.
    roy litherland it's happened i told you it would

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    I’m new in here, fellas. Just read your posts. Hope all works out for you. Tough times are sent to try us, no doubt. Good luck to you all

  21. #171
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    Quote Originally Posted by Angry Dave View Post
    So just over 9 months on from this and yesterday I made a couple of big decisions. I'm in Germany at the moment, well actually sat on a train going to the airport to come home. This Covid outbreak has caused our site to be closed and I'm not hanging around to end up locked down here. The reason I mention it is I've decided now that I'm done with working away, I started to drift back to it last year instead sticking to my guns but the truth is, I hate it now.
    The second thing I decided was that I'm going teetotal, as much as I've tried, and god knows I have, me and booze don't go together, so that's it, I'm calling it a day. Other than that, I hope everyone is OK.
    Dave,

    Good luck - 2 big things here, achieving one or the other would be great, so don't feel you've failed if you don't hit both.

    I don't know you, probably never will (live near Cambridge but from St H), so if you want a chat which would be confidential - DM me - I've been through a few things myself and just believe in paying it back as well as paying it forward.

    Best of luck, and take it one breath at a time,

    Ian

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    Quote Originally Posted by Bungle View Post
    Dave,

    Good luck - 2 big things here, achieving one or the other would be great, so don't feel you've failed if you don't hit both.

    I don't know you, probably never will (live near Cambridge but from St H), so if you want a chat which would be confidential - DM me - I've been through a few things myself and just believe in paying it back as well as paying it forward.

    Best of luck, and take it one breath at a time,

    Ian
    Hello mate, the teetotal thing didn't last long, I had a bit of wobble on Friday and got hammered but got my head together on Saturday and I'm ok with that, I'd already had a drink a couple of times but not to that extent. Fortunately I've come to realise what a great set of mates I have as I'd made arrangements for both Saturday and tonight which I cancelled and both fully understood.

    As for work, well the job in Sweden came to nothing, I'm not really bothered to be honest but had an interview today for a role based locally which has got my interest, we'll see what happens.

    The reason I post in this thread fairly often is that I find it helps me, but also I hope it's of some help to others who may be going through problems. Thanks for your kind offer, but I'm genuinely pretty good at the moment.

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    From one Dave to another- good to see you have a positive attitude. All the best for now and into the future ��

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    Quote Originally Posted by Saintgibbo View Post
    From one Dave to another- good to see you have a positive attitude. All the best for now and into the future ��
    Cheers mate, and you. It's good to get your perspective from the other side of the world. Will you guys get the SL games on TV once we get going? We get all of yours at the moment. In fact we've got tons of sport on TV at the moment.

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    I've been wanting to write this all week. I'm really struggling at the moment, I'm drinking too much and can feel the depression creeping back in again. I think that's what's getting me down, I've been making an effort to do the right things and I can't seem to get it right. Tried to knock the drink on the head but that in itself makes me unhappy, tried a change of direction workwise but don't seem to be getting anywhere. On top of that it just feels like everything in my life is going wrong.

    It probably sounds a bit self pitying this and I know I'm not that hard done to but it feels like life has taken a massive crap on my shoulder.

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